Out of the Ashes, God's bigger picture!

Do you sometimes look back on the hard times in your life, see the damage its done, and wish you hadn't had to go through it?  I wish that sometimes with some experiences in my life.  Especially some that involve my family's dysfunction when I was growing up.  It took a long time for me to dig through that baggage and feel like I was doing more than just existing in life.

This was kind of a underlying topic today. Probably also more on my mind because I am reading the story of Joseph in the Bible.  And in general in my job, I'm surrounded by patients that probably at one point think those thoughts.  The reason they see me is because they were injured, had a stroke, or disease that is causing pain and decreased function in some way.

Reading this morning I was really struck by how Joseph so graciously forgave his brothers for selling him into slavery.  He literally told them it wasn't their fault because God had a purpose to save many people and his family from Egypt's great famine. 

• Genesis 45:5-7: " And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will be no plowing and reaping. But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance."

Honestly, after being sold as a slave, falsely accused of crime against Potifer's wife, thrown in jail, and forgotten after interpreting a couple dreams,  I would be a cranky chick.  Even if luck passed my way and finally ended up as Pharaoh's second in command, I would still have a hard time with anger and bitterness toward my brothers.  But over and over again Joseph is moved to tears!  He is actually grateful for all his hardships because of where it brought him and he saw God's bigger picture.

My friend at work, stated a similar thing about her life.  Basically the idea that what didn't kill her as a kid even though painful and traumatic sometimes made her stronger.  I mainly agree with that, but you can  be stronger but have no loving, kind, tender heart.  Joseph manages to trust God so much through his experiences that he is resilient beyond most, and keeps his tender heart.

I wish to have that kind of heart that no matter what I go through nothing destroys my desire to love, give, be grateful, share joy.  So I look at my past a little differently tonight.  Maybe the very things I went through are to prepare me to be the exact person God made me to be.  Maybe many will be helped because I went through all this junk in my life.

What experiences in your past keep you locked down, or pour bitterness into your life?   Is it possible the very things that have been a thorn in your side or a big gash in your heart, are they very things that can shape you into ministering to another person in need?  How can you find God's bigger picture?  Sometimes it means looking beyond ourselves to God and asking Him to show us.  Then like Joseph we can begin to see some of the beautiful things God is pulling out of the ashes of our lives to help others. :)